"Some of the best sex I've ever had was by surprise...."

Need I say more...Rape is funny to me. Moving on I guess. Yesterday I got down on some of my XBOX360 for a little before I went to bed. A guy started talking to me while I was playing billiards online. I didn't really have much to say to him cause he was a stranger. (Thanks for that lesson Mom)So I tried to stop talking to him and squeeze in a game of Madden before nighty night. What do you know, now he friend requests me. So I say yes. Then he invites me to a private conversation where, you guessed it, he also owns Madden 07. Great. I got stuck talking to a stranger, and more importantly, getting the crap kicked out of the Washington Redskins by the Chicago Bears. He also had quite and extensive knowledge of anything football. Which for anyone that knows almost nothing, can be a conversation killer. That's like when I start rambling out WWE wrestling, and you can see the person your talking to is looking around the room for something to jump chest first into. It's awkward is what I'm saying.
Tonight I will be hosting at Topaz so we'll see how that goes. I'm looking forward to it, mostly cause it's one of those occasions that I get to grab a mic and jump on a stage. But also cause being the host will allow me to go off page and just work the crizzy a little bit. That slang in the last sentence was for the word crowd. Now you all see why I make a horrible thug. Threatening phrases lose something when they have to be translated. Or maybe... maybe I just shouldn't explain it and then they'll be frightened cause I'm a gang member who's practically speaking Spanish while robbing them. I'll have to do some field work on that and get back to you when I have firm results...
This is a little short so let me see if I can muster up enough magic to bring this bitch on home. (Cough) (Cough) "If I had gills, I think it would be cool to hide in swimming pools and wait for someone to pee in the water. Right when I smelled, tasted, or felt the warmth of the urine I'd sneak up behind them. Before they were done I would take my thumb and try as hard as I could to shove it in their butt. It would be cool cause I'd never have to come up for air." That's the best thing that I could muster, tomorrow is a whole new bitch. But for today, let's treat this one with respect.