Don't want no short short blog

Happiness is emotion in which one experiences feelings ranging from contentment and satisfaction to bliss and intense joy. This definition is, however, a synonymous one. A more clarified one is almost impossible to conceive due to the capacity by which a human can allocate the correct words into an appropriate and merit able sentence that would describe happiness.

(it's in the palm of your hands, get it? course you did)

Well Hersday is here just like it has a tendency to do, but what have you all been up to? Playing go fish? Perhaps some of you were reading an encyclopedia, but no matter what you were doing you definitely weren't at Wiseacres last night... cause there was no open mic last night. I had to drive there and find that out the hard way. Fortunately, I had promises of some of my Grandma's chili(easily a ten on the orgasm scale) and so I turned around with no attitude and set out for Grandma's. I won't give too much detail but I ate a couple of bowls with the ol' gal and this was (really long pause cause I can't remember) about 8 o' clizzy. It's 9:26 am right now, I have been to the bathroom twice in the three hours I have been awake and the first time involved dashing back to my bathroom from my car. There is nothing worse than having to sit on gremlin while stuck in traffic. Stuff like that makes you speed, speeding gets you a ticket, cops take a while to write tickets before they send you on your way, cops also hate it when you $#!t yourself while waiting for them to come back and give you a ticket. So, I'm glad that I ran back upstairs and of course, as soon as I made it to my desk and worked for oh... 10 minutes(being honest, spell check actually had to help me with "minutes" good grief) there it is again. Had to walk down a couple floors cause the bathroom is so close to my section I don't want to be identified by my Stacy Adams'(nice black people shoes, for the white folk).

The greatest trick that anyone who naturally likes to talk has is..... silence. Talkative comics/men, trust me when I say that shutting your mouth at all times(while at work) will supply you with the mystery and attractiveness that we all crave. It sucks keeping silent, but I keep getting introduced or bumping into people in weird ways. I never believed in the whole "Just let you're paths cross casually and speak when the moment presents itself" theory, but it's as true as the fact that you can see a little package outline when I have on dress slacks :) Now if only I could control when I casually bump into this older mixed woman in marketing. P.S. - if anyone has a great way to propose to a stranger I'd love to hear it.

The Meximelt is delicious... that is all.

I know I've probably said this before, but stay with me on this. A man is running around a track. He is naked, and the track is littered with hurdles. When someone fires the starting gun he takes off and has been instructed to relieve himself of all bodily fluid during his run. For some reason that thought is hilarious to me. Might be a little funnier to me if it was a girl... who was shy. Ah, to dream.

Lost tonight!!!!!!!!!!! What the hell ever happened to that thick black cloud that killed Anabeese? Or that random polar bear?

Whenever I make eye contact with any of the older African women that work on my floor, they seem to have a look in their eyes like they don't trust me. And, they shouldn't. I've tasted goat and did not enjoy, so we have very little in common. Those two things have nothing to do with each other but just know that I'm not the biggest fan of Africans on the planet. And any militants that want to go back home(to Africa, for the white folk)... good f*cking luck, it's hot outside baby.

Tyler test for human similarities:

1. Do you swear and get upset when someone won't let you in while trying to merge with traffic or change lanes?
2. Shortly after you've calmed down, do you make people trying to merge into traffic wait to get in front of the guy behind you? Then laugh when you see them get mad at the fact that you didn't let them merge into traffic or change lanes?

That my friends is hypocrisy. And that is what makes us human. If you answered yes, you're good people. If you said no to any question, what is Mars like in the spring?

I don't want to waste anymore of your afternoon, but I've got a little (if only that were true) work to do. Happy Hersday everyone.... by the way, since I actually refer to Thursday like that in the office, now people in my section are calling it Hersday. I know they probably found it amusing to speak of the day like we were advertising for a club, but part of me wants to believe that it's because of mind control. Tomato, Tomato(to be pronounced like a ignorant person) I guess.

Laters