Be a N*gger Too by Nas

Just in case you haven't heard it yet, thought I'd put that out there. I don't really get the controversy though, if you're black I feel like it's your perogotive to say or not say that word. Whether or not everyone can say it?.... I repeat :If you're black then you decide how you want to embrace or shy from that word. It's got as much power as we give it.

I saw Cloverfield last night... not a fan. I guess that if the writers were being completely honest the movie would have been about 25 minutes long. Cause from the second that the plan changed from saving my @ss, I'm out. Let me just ruin a minute of the plot, trust me it's not important, here we go. A female calls our protagonist and says "Help me", his friend and the only character worth liking, Hud, immediately says "But, she's that way, you know what else is that way.... That MONSTER". It's at that point that I wanted Hud to walk away and set the camera on the ground. I'd have stood up and clapped d*cks with Nelson, no homo (what would that look like? Hmmm... no, no homo). Instead, he says "We're coming with you"...sigh. That's where they lost me cause I wouldn't even come back for Chapstick, which I have a deadly addiction too. I'm a Chap addict, but I would just get by and let my face turn into Tommy Lee Jones before I'd risk going back into town. Couple of things I wish had happened. This one is stupid, but I wish that a black man would've walked by and saw that thing, all I'd want him to scream is "White people"(it had white skin, but that thought made me chuckle to myself last night). Told you it was stupid. Secondly, it screamed like the monster that they admitted ripping it off from, Godzilla. For the sheer joy of a cheap laugh am I to believe that no one recommended having a scared Asian running down the street screaming "Godzira!!!"? Come on now.

I'm making a muscle right now, know what it looks like? Ray J's most private business. No, he doesn't have "A Very Muscular ____", his just makes a turn to the right. A SHARP turn to the right, as far as sphincters go anyway. Disgusting, DO NOT WATCH THE KIM KARDASHIAN SEX TAPE!!!! There is a lot more Ray J than there is Kim Kardashian. At one point, between different speeches chalked full of slang about how thugnificant he is, he dances. But this is the jig a 13 year old does when he first finds out where the va-jj is... except he's still having sex while doing this dance and making a face like he's fighting a $#!t. Did I mention that when his ____ takes that sharp right turn, it's accompanied by a vein big enough to be on Andre the Giant's part. DISGUSTING Ray J. May God forever bless you with clothes, cause I don't want to live in a world where Ray J's just walk around clothe less. And surgery is probably a good suggestion. Why does it not mention that when you search that video online. Distraction? Hell yeah.

Gotta go to lunch so, we'll do this tomorrow. Hope to see muchos comics at Wiseacres tonight, we'll see how that goes.

Laters

The Agenda.... & Video

Okay so first off you'll find the video from the Funnybone above. I figured it's easier to watch if you don't have to go clicking everywhere... and I procrastinated on putting it on MySpace and YouTube forever. But now that it's up, please "Get you some!!!!!"

First thing when my alarm went off I had that Saturday morning feeling. So much so, that when I turned it off I went back to sleep for a second and then a little angel on my shoulder reminded me that we hadn't lived through Friday yet.... S#IT! "Wake that @SS up TRich!, F*ck is you doin!?" So, I dashed out the door after a brief laugh with my Nelson. Oh, and the dryer didn't dry my sweater all the way and that is a feeling of gross that I can't describe. But, it's new, it's sexy, and it definitely needed a wash since I threw up on it at a party a couple weeks ago. And the poor thing has just been sitting there waiting to be cleaned and seen during a casual Friday such as this. So, what is the agenda? Well, the good folks at Paramount Pictures got me. I'm curious and even though every site that has an opinion I trust says that Cloverfield sucks, I have to know what that monster looks like! It's killing me... by the way, for anyone else going to see that, the movie is 75-82 minutes in length. That's shorter than Cinderella(the animated Disney film from our youth) was. Disappointing, but you know what, as long as he kills someone and dies at the end, what else could I ask for? All week I've know what I wanted to do in preparation for this movie. I'm gonna go pick up my ol' friend Mary(wink), then I'm gonna get a shape up, then off to KFC for 3(that's right I'm driving in the stereotype-mobile) BUCKETS of Hot Wings, then off to Bloom for Mucho Cerveza(Miller Lite), and off course it's home to start the festivities with Nelson, Kevin, Andrea, Charlie, Josh and his lovely bride. Tomorrow it's back to comedy but tonight it's about good ol' fashioned non-sense, hopefully I'll make it home in time for some Rock Band before I crash out. But, there's always Saturday morning for that, it's not like I'm a douche that works out on Saturday morning(take offense to that if you wake up and work out, you're taking life a little too serious). Ah...... Fridays(as he kicks his feet up on his desk as though he were at home...but not really though, I'm at work)

Yesterday the roads were just fine when I got off work to race to an audition, but people drove about 3 miles an hour. I almost lost my mind cause not only was I late, but then I started improvising the Mapquest directions with my memory and that is always trouble. My memory is S#it folks. So, of course I lost. With the clock ticking before the company closed I called up Keith (the comedian, he's good, he says "Sup") and worked out a formula of getting lost more and then finding the right way. So I arrived with all of 9 minutes before they were supposed to close and I think my read went well. I take back what I said the other day, cause the person I spoke to on the phone(Steve) was very cool and so was Chris. Time will tell on that one, and I made it home the same time as Charlie who live close to me and came home directly from work. Gotta love it when something comes together on a good Thursday like that.

I've been listening to Hybrid Theory by Linkin Park a lot the last week. I don't know why but my soul just felt like rocking out for a while. That is all.

Well, it's that time again. My brain has run out of thing to jaw-jack about and I'm leaving for the weekend. I hope everyone is safe and makes their way back to work on Monday. Cause if you don't do your job who the F*ck will?!

Laters...