Let me start by saying that I hate the sun. If it weren't for the fact that our lives and way of living are directly contingent on it's existence, I could worship a Wolfen God that fears it.... and seeks to destroy it. Now, nothing depresses me more than a day where the sun is shining and I'm trapped in an environment that celebrates the sun. I went into a meeting this morning and it was nice and breezy in the board room. What is the first thing that someone did? Turn the heat all the way up and up the blind exposing me to enough sun against my back to destroy me (that's a reference to being a vampire). Bring on the rainy Sunday that Google says it coming.... "please God".
Nothing upsets me more than when traffic is abysmal as soon as you jump on the highway. You take the alternate route that you know to get to work. You know you'll be late but at least you're not going to get stuck like everyone else in your section and be hours late. You struggle to get to work 20 minutes late. And, what do you see when you walk to your desk? Everyone is already hard at work and made it to work right on time?!?!?!? How does the entire world (my section) not come across the parking lot blocking the most popular way to work?! Then a co-worker tells you "You come from Dumfries right?" Yeah. "I could see your traffic when I hopped on I-95, apparently a truck lost a trailer or something. It was terrible but was taken care of about 3 miles down the road". WHAT?! This would be okay every once in a blue moon. But, every time that I get caught in some giant $#!tstorm of traffic, everyone is sitting there like it didn't exist. F**kin racism man.
It probably didn't help that this morning as I got ready for work I tried to put on a pink shirt. What, Tyler that doesn't make sense. Well, the reason the pink shirt slowed me down is that it deceived me. I went in my closet and knew it would be hot so I decided to wear a polo. I spotted this pink one that I haven't worn in forever so I pick it up. Thinking that it fell from the hangar, I go and iron it. I run out the door and down the stairs to my car. When I get to the car I try to brush something off the collar and it smeared. It was a speck but now I was looking at the shirt in daylight and focused away from that smear. Now I see that there is a huge stain on the bottom of the shirt, I'll describe this stain as Baby vomit. Baby vomit when the baby's been eating mashed up carrots for a while. I could have tucked this in, and no it didn't cross my mind, cause as I turned the car around to head back I spot more baby vomit near my neck. Baby vomit when the baby's been eating pea soup. I was instantly glad that I didn't tuck that shirt in. Cause when I got to work, let alone the meeting that lasted two hours, I would have been the elephant in the corner. Except, I have a friend in my section and I'm pretty sure she would let me know that I was a nasty individual.
Kudos to Chris White for bringing up the lack of blogging. What the H-E-double hockey sticks are you guys doing all day if you're not reading/blogging??? Working?!
There is no feeling sweeter than hating an old supervisor and then knowing that you're almost the same grade level. Patsy, one day before you retire I hope to bite my thumb at you. Young people (who didn't read Romeo and Juliet) that is how the elderly used to show disrespect and contempt for each other in oldentimey days. Then they all gathered to do the Charleston. Now you learned something.
I hear nothing but GREAT things about Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Can anyone say "Rainy Sunday at the local Matinee"? Yeah you can.
Guess I should get to living, we'll blink our eyes and next thing you know it will be Monday and I'll be telling everyone to show up at the Spy Lounge. Cause the Spy Lounge is off the muthaf*ckin' chain. "How's that Eli? Might not have been as subliminal as I was going for but I think it worked." Eli says "S-alright", and that's team work people.
Be safe and don't smoke crack.
Laters
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