Don't wonder, that quote was a treat that I received courtesy of my friend Charlie earlier this morning. Bless his horrible soul. The last several days served up a lot of potential stress. But, the big G was looking out for me. Respect.
Let us go back to Saturday. I, a young man with buttocks of a God, am making my way home from a lovely little town call "Alexandria". As I sped home at a brisk 90 mph, I couldn't help but notice that my accelerator wasn't functioning anymore. I pulled over....think...thin..got it. I call McNelson and inform he and Kevin that their negro is quite a jam and could use a couple of chaps to come and help me hump this bad situation into submission. They showed up about a half hour later. We ride... home. I wake up, being a procrastinatory(I do believe I just made up a mantastic word just there) chap I did not call to get the car towed from I-95 immediately. That's where I F%cked up. Upon speaking to the towing company I'm informed that there is a good chance that my car has been impounded already.... like modern day Gypsies they read my fortune. So, the police were very polite in getting me to the people that now had my vehicle... asses. And, wouldn't you know that when I called they had just gotten my car. If only I hadn't lied in bed for a hour before getting up on Sunday. Sunday, Sunday, Sunday....ah(wasn't I telling a story?! Better get back to it then) So, I find out that it will be a couple hundred bucks for the impounding (AHHH) and then it needs to be towed( Jeez) and then someone gets to tell me what's wrong.... my worst fears were confirmed. The Korean men that I spoke to put it very simply in their "fresh off the boat way" ahem---"Your car not get OIL for long time. adsfd dsadsa ENGINE dadff gaggad." There is a word in that second sentence that should stick out like a sore thumb. Then we get a night of waiting to hear what magical number he pulls from a hat to fix the car. I'm horribly cheap, so waitin on this call is like waitin to get home while at work suckin' back a "No. 2". Finally, the number..... I don't need to tell you that I wasn't excited to hear it. But, let's focus on the positives here...... yep, there are none. But, you'd never know about trouble if you were looking me in the eye cause I was a rock. I just don't shake or tremble.
Bachelor Party this weekend. Should be fun, and yeah STRANGE. Although, and it's gonna sound pretty gay, I don't have the energy to chase these females. I think people get all types of productive things done when they pretend like the other sex doesn't exist. Like today for example: I'm going commando but due to the fact that I'm working and walking flirting, I don't have to worry about a chubby friend of ours creating any awkward situations. Cause all it takes is a good perfume and your pal( and mine) is ready to meet everyone and get a good smell of'um.
Even though I know that my job is looking at our emails, I still keep opening emails from people that I know will curse while I'm at work. I must stop this, but the words OPEN THIS OFF THE CLOCK are never in the subject line, so I get dooped everytime.
Laters
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