Baltimore Comedy Factory! March 26-28th! TRich is hosting for Kyle Grooms!! w00t
Here we are again, a DVDuesday with a bang… not really, but I think Quantum of Solace came out today so “YAY!” to that.
Was there anything this weekend worth speaking of? Hmmm, other than “the usual” I can’t say that Nelson and I did anything special. Though I will say that despite what S.P.E. might tell you, Resident Evil 5 is insane!!!! Especially really high and in the dark of 2 A.M. Sean Paul Ellis… I call a decree of SHENANIGANS!
I like that AIG thinks they can still give out bonuses. It’s a risky yet bold maneuver that most people wouldn’t expect. Like showing up an hour late, turning on your computer and spending another 30 minutes in the can getting rid of all that Chipotle.
Today, “The Colonel” made my drive through traffic a living nightmare. I love HOT WINGS (they seem to be marketing them as “Sauce less Hot Wings” to white people) and have since I was a child. But they don’t like me one bit. Luckily, I woke up about a half an hour earlier than normal. But no matter how done you feel when you walk out the front door, it doesn’t matter in the middle of rush hour on the interstate. Something dropped, let’s just say the next hour and a half of traffic were no picnic. For the first time ever I thought of shoving a Pepsi bottle up my ass (just a little bit, don’t want to spill) and trying to concentrate. In my defense, I really didn’t think I could make it. Thank God my intuition was wrong huh?
“Tyler, how do I know when it’s time to start settling down?” That’s an easy question Geronimo (what, had to give him a name), I got the hunch when my mother stopped telling me to hide “the wang” from everyone. Gradually she moved to “Bout time you had some children… you know I’m dying right?” She’s not dying any quicker than you or I (unless you have Magic’s HIV, cause then you’re not dying at all) but like to put a rush on a (N Word).
24 was off the chain as usual last night, much props to Jack Bauer. West, west ya’ll.
Erections at work always suck, it completely takes the sentiment away when you start reminiscing about old nakedness and then you have to snap the bone. I don’ know how you guys do it (flipping into the belt still turns me on) but I find that if I try to snap it long enough, I’ve forgotten about whatever made me so rock solid.
Sometimes when I stop and just shut up, I can still hear James Jones running through a few minutes. Oh, what that man does to me… oh, what he does to you.
Erection putting me to sleep… loss of blood to the he… WAKE UP!!!!!! I’m here, gonna forget about the naked image. Oh God, why does my mind have to be a human highlight reel for sex.
I forgot my cell phone at home for the second time in the past couple of weeks. Please let someone have called or texted. If no one loves me enough to call and say “Yeah (N Word), all up in yo daytime minutes!” then I don’t want to live. I’m gonna eat a whole “thing” of Haagen Daaz and write a suicide note with a twist. (I was going to explain what that meant but after looking at it, I think I’ll just let you guys guess what that could mean.
I’ve decided that the next Riding with Strangers video will have nothing to do with sex. Mainly just because there are so many others things to laugh about… like toilet humor. Sadly, the next video won’t be about that either. Consider, if you will, a love story told through song. Not saying I can get Nelson to agree to that, but I feel like fork stabbing him will convince him to do just about anything.
I have big eyes. I feel them in my face when I look in different directions.
WTF happened to the BEATNUTS?
FACT:
Most people do not have $2000 saved in a bank account. I think just telling more people that, because at first it seems like a small number until you find out most people don’t have it, it important. Save people, there is a bit of a recession going on.
With that said, I’m out.
Peaces
Was there anything this weekend worth speaking of? Hmmm, other than “the usual” I can’t say that Nelson and I did anything special. Though I will say that despite what S.P.E. might tell you, Resident Evil 5 is insane!!!! Especially really high and in the dark of 2 A.M. Sean Paul Ellis… I call a decree of SHENANIGANS!
I like that AIG thinks they can still give out bonuses. It’s a risky yet bold maneuver that most people wouldn’t expect. Like showing up an hour late, turning on your computer and spending another 30 minutes in the can getting rid of all that Chipotle.
Today, “The Colonel” made my drive through traffic a living nightmare. I love HOT WINGS (they seem to be marketing them as “Sauce less Hot Wings” to white people) and have since I was a child. But they don’t like me one bit. Luckily, I woke up about a half an hour earlier than normal. But no matter how done you feel when you walk out the front door, it doesn’t matter in the middle of rush hour on the interstate. Something dropped, let’s just say the next hour and a half of traffic were no picnic. For the first time ever I thought of shoving a Pepsi bottle up my ass (just a little bit, don’t want to spill) and trying to concentrate. In my defense, I really didn’t think I could make it. Thank God my intuition was wrong huh?
“Tyler, how do I know when it’s time to start settling down?” That’s an easy question Geronimo (what, had to give him a name), I got the hunch when my mother stopped telling me to hide “the wang” from everyone. Gradually she moved to “Bout time you had some children… you know I’m dying right?” She’s not dying any quicker than you or I (unless you have Magic’s HIV, cause then you’re not dying at all) but like to put a rush on a (N Word).
24 was off the chain as usual last night, much props to Jack Bauer. West, west ya’ll.
Erections at work always suck, it completely takes the sentiment away when you start reminiscing about old nakedness and then you have to snap the bone. I don’ know how you guys do it (flipping into the belt still turns me on) but I find that if I try to snap it long enough, I’ve forgotten about whatever made me so rock solid.
Sometimes when I stop and just shut up, I can still hear James Jones running through a few minutes. Oh, what that man does to me… oh, what he does to you.
Erection putting me to sleep… loss of blood to the he… WAKE UP!!!!!! I’m here, gonna forget about the naked image. Oh God, why does my mind have to be a human highlight reel for sex.
I forgot my cell phone at home for the second time in the past couple of weeks. Please let someone have called or texted. If no one loves me enough to call and say “Yeah (N Word), all up in yo daytime minutes!” then I don’t want to live. I’m gonna eat a whole “thing” of Haagen Daaz and write a suicide note with a twist. (I was going to explain what that meant but after looking at it, I think I’ll just let you guys guess what that could mean.
I’ve decided that the next Riding with Strangers video will have nothing to do with sex. Mainly just because there are so many others things to laugh about… like toilet humor. Sadly, the next video won’t be about that either. Consider, if you will, a love story told through song. Not saying I can get Nelson to agree to that, but I feel like fork stabbing him will convince him to do just about anything.
I have big eyes. I feel them in my face when I look in different directions.
WTF happened to the BEATNUTS?
FACT:
Most people do not have $2000 saved in a bank account. I think just telling more people that, because at first it seems like a small number until you find out most people don’t have it, it important. Save people, there is a bit of a recession going on.
With that said, I’m out.
Peaces
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