Off the f*cking Wall

Last night was a blast at UMD’s Off the Wall! Justin, I felt bad about missing SOME of your set (I was able to catch a good chunk and thought his writing had come along nicely). The place was packed, Justin made an accurate observation in his blog (do I need to put a link, don’t most of you read his stuff anyway? Fine) http://www.justincousson.blogspot.com/ … there! He stated that room seated 40 people comfortably and there were 110 people crammed in there. The crazy part was people kept coming even when they saw that we were literally a tickle away from the BIGGEST ORGY YOU’VE EVER SEEN. I was pleased that a 28-year-old junior was performing it really made me feel like I wasn’t the oldest person in the room, cause I’m 25. Most of the comics seemed to garner a pretty great response (Justin, cover your face and look down about 2 lines), but one made me laugh without really making me smile, if that makes sense. I don’t remember the kid’s name, but he got up and read A NEVER ENDING STORY. At first I was childishly (yeah, I did just create that word) amused, and then I looked around after about 6 minutes and noticed that the room was kickstanding their faces. He had 10 minutes and used that story like a sponge, to soak up every second. The part that really made me laugh on the inside was when he turned to (about) page 4 or 5 and I looked over at the one black girl. She gave a sigh like someone just twisted a knife. Atif had some new (or just new to me) jokes that I liked, I feel terrible every time I’m around him cause I didn’t care much for him in our first encounter. We spoke about that long ago, I apologized cause I felt like my attitude showed, he forgave… homies. Without really speaking on my own performance too much, the kids were extremely kind to my jokes. I had more fun talking to them than I can recall in some time. Definitely an enjoyable ride home. I just wish I’d done one of their shows sooner. The way things are going, Justin might need to move to an auditorium or something, the demand is there…

How dare I not mention that some sexy comics will be at the DC Improv for the FIRST “Homegrown Comedy” showcase on October 10th. I love this list, I started with Will and Tyler S., and can’t wait to put on a great show with everyone involved. Grab a seat, if you dare…

Hosted by: Hampton Yount
Eli Sairs, Will Hessler, Tyler Richardson, Jake Young, Nora Nolan, Adrian Rodney, and Tyler Sonnichsen.

Quote of the Week: “I still want them, I just don’t wanna pay. Why do you think I didn’t put them down on the move-belt thing? You gotta give them to me for free now, because I had to call you over.” – Customer at Bottom Dollar

The problem with eating a lot of Lasagna and my sweet Grandmama’s spicy (as f*ck) chili late when returning home from UMD are… riding in traffic on Friday morning with both feet crossed praying you don’t have to turn the car around.

Friday has officially become my day for Chipotle. Chipotle, listen closely “Though I love you, I cannot just hand over my paychecks. That’s not the agreement we had when we spoke about commitment. I can’t quit you, but I will cut you out of my life… a little bit. Don’t think for a second that if you see me unexpectedly on a Monday or Wednesday that I’ve come back for good. I’m weak, I’m just a man. Dammit babe, let’s not fight anymore! I do love you and I hate when you look at me like that. Let’s go back to my place.” Never mind what I said earlier about Fridays. We talked about it and I was jumping to conclusions. And I have an announcement… I’m engaged.

Random Grandpa memory: “When you were about 2 or 3, we were in Amsterdam walking through the Red Light District. We passed a woman in the window and you pointed at her, you said “Grandpa, I want that”. A man near us laughed and said “Well, he’s on the right track”. I said I know.” – Grandpa, he loved to tell me that story

I met someone about a year ago that I speak to on and off. It is incredible how a like we are. One door closes, another opens…

Here’s a sad racist moment that Nelson, Kevin and I shared the other day. While sitting and playing Soul Calibur IV, Kevin was sharing a story about a “FUNK” that worked it’s way through his floor earlier that day. He described the scent as “An Indian man that had not bathed in almost a month…” Nelson and I said, in unison, “Yeah” to agree we knew what kind of smell he was talking about. I immediately stepped outside myself and thought, “Damn, that was racist.” To be young…

Did anyone purchase T.I.’s album Paper Trail ? I keep forgetting to download it for free. Sorry T.I.

Okay, I’ve given about 1:30 of reading. Don’t worry, I’ve got a busy weekend ahead of me and that should lead into quite the post for Monday. Don’t quote me, cause I f*cked up last weekend and drove to “the Lizard” for no reason, but I believe Saturday is another show. You should definitely call Tyler S. first though. If you don’t have his number, you clearly aren’t a comic. Just kidding… but not really though.

Laters