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Just as good as a Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich.

Monday, March 29, 2010

Hmm, someone dropped frosty... nope, not frosting.


Well, here we are at the beginning of another week. We made it… where is Johnny? Dammit, he’s supposed to bring snacks for the vegetarians at the party next week! Why Lord, take Pete instead Lord, take Pete instead! Pete… could you give me some space for a minute? You’re smothering me man.

Something that keeps running through my mind is the sword happy mouse from Alice in Wonderland. He never hesitated to pull his sword even if someone just wanted to know what time it was. And, he stabbed quite a few people in that movie.

Most valuable lesson I learned this weekend? When someone is hurling a television, you want to catch it.

I’m just about done moving and I feel like I was fighting off a prisoner’s advances all weekend. I have got to get in the gym.

I’m getting excited about a show on Wednesday, pictures to come…

I got my passport in the mail on Saturday and now I have all of the pieces for my journey to Funnyfest in May. Tickets, check, passport, check, ass less chaps… double cheek check. Ugh!

Whenever a Redman song comes on my phone on shuffle, I want to start stomping around my floor and “woof”-ing at people. His music takes me back to a simpler time, a time without condoms or crime. That’s right; the 90’s.

I keep wanting to yell at people like a wizard. “You have been banished!” “Valhalla!” “Head due west until the sun touches the canyon!”

The new stuff that I was dying to tell last week has grown hands and feet. I don’t really know what that is supposed to mean but people laughed. I don’t know what a joke with hands and feet would look like but I picture it kicking someone’s door in and strangling them for no reason whatsoever. Because jokes kill, believe dat.

When you have a classy woman in the car and you’re faced with the choice of Lil Wayne or Frank Sinatra; I’ve found Sinatra is a better choice. I found that out with trial and error of course, nothing was said but the awkwardness was pretty tangible. Lessons for the future…

I saw Eli Sairs pick up a dying puppy and punt it towards a trash can, which he missed by the way. The dog was going to die, that’s not the issue, the issue is that Eli Sairs is a litterbug.

I bought a MX vs. ATV game yesterday on a whim because the cable guy wouldn’t make it to my new house until today. I think I need to practice will power because I played it for an hour before putting Tiger Woods 10 back into the XBOX.

And yeah, I ate at Chipotle again yesterday. Love knows no bounds, it only knows textures. Our love is like touching a Rice Krispy Treat, slightly sticky but delicious.

Is it inappropriate to tell someone at work that you feel they’re abandoning breast feeding too early? Yeah… I should keep my mouth shut.

Peaces

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I blog during work to keep from sleeping. Unless people from my job are monitoring this, in which case "I love my job; I have a family". My dog Max is the man too. Other than that I think reading this blog gives a pretty good idea of what I'm about. Red Jell-o, need I say more.

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