I'll be making giggles come to life, murderous life, at the Baltimore Comedy Factory tonight through Saturday. Larry XL (who is always nice to me when we meet) will be featuring and Mark Simmons will be headlining. May the women be clean, the beer chilled and the audience as silly as watching Nelson dance for 14 hours in the ass less chaps marathon of 2005. Did that marathon of a man dancing with his ass out really happen Tyler? Definitely, and you better believe it was silly... and then I turned the hose on him when I'd had my fill of laughter. Whore.
I discovered Steven Segal: Lawman yesterday. What more do you need to say about that? It was just as weird as you would've hoped. Stares off into nowhere, corny slang for the black youths of Louisiana that he's arresting and most importantly the hair. He is quick and a damn good shot, but c'mon, who's taking him seriously? All I want to see him do is get into hand to hand combat, but people use guns pretty exclusively these days so that's out. I think I'd rather see him put on a Gi and go around trying to fight crime. But since this is all I have, I will watch him deal out the law.
The woman waiting in front of me at a Japanese food place (I know, it would have sounded better if I knew the name) came running up to the cashier and screamed "Where the f*** is my food at?!" It made me laugh and I immediately started tweeting while laughing in front of her. I tweeted it the other day, but it makes me laugh so there.
This one goes out to my boy Jessie Thomas out in WV for the weekend at the Funnybone. May you make it out of there completely rape free. Jessie's white but I still worry, I guess I'm just a good friend.
I have a big patch of missing skin under my nose because I was feverishly rubbing dead skin off my nose before returning to work for the first time since Monday. My allergies made Monday a nightmare, all the wiping and blowing my nose caused the skin on it to scab. Now I look like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
2010 is right around the corner now, may there be plenty of strange lying right around the bend. Strange for everyone...
It's been a crazy year for my love life, never expected to fall for someone. I'm surprised at the course of events, from old women, new women and acquaintances. May this next year bring something better than I know how to wish for. Somewhere the woman meant to be with me is smiling and happy, she better get all that joy out before we enter our awkward life together.
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