Someone didn't flush! And it got away!

Since I'm moving shortly (not away, not yet) here are my favorite apartment memories:

• Watching Nelson and Kevin randomly break into sword fights in the hallway. Real swords, real men… it’s always fun and games until someone loses a testicle.
• Discovering a door that leads to nowhere in my room after having lived there for over a year.
• While cleaning one day there were poo particles all over this rug that was under Max’s cage. I went on the balcony and and shook the rug one good time while talking to Nelson. As soon as the particles hit the wind we heard a man scream like he’d been stabbed. I quickly shut the door and we laughed for the better part of 15 minutes.
• My Mom came to visit one day while Kevin and I were in the middle of Rock Band. I’m not sure if it’s because we’re black or because she had no idea I was that skilled in something so nerdy, but her face was the look of “I have no son.”
• Trying to clean “my smoking pipe” I had the brilliant idea of microwaving it to warm things up. I did not consider that “black gold” would come spurting out instantly and the microwave would instantly smoke like an old freight train. Within 15 minutes I was running up and down the hallway trying not to let the fog of “smoke” settle since Kevin’s girlfriend was in his room and I didn’t want to alarm her. In the end, I had to boil that pipe and was an idiot for thinking that would work.
• Seeing Nelson answer the door for the first time with the full replica of the Final Fantasy VII sword. I think it is spelled Zwyhander, but I don’t care enough to Google that.
• When I accidentally put a Coke can in the freezer and left for comedy it exploded and covered everything in sticky goodness. I do not believe I was the one who cleaned it.
• I began putting pieces of nasty that were in the sink (because guys can be gross and let a week go by without doing dishes if there are still ones in the cupboards) in a Vitamin Water bottle. I call it my bottle of nasty and it’s been stewing for almost three years. I don’t own a gun but if you break in and give me time to formulate a plan I might blind you with my skunk bottle. Or at least severely irritate your facial skin.
• Finally trying Absinthe was a fun night. Maybe it was a couple of nights, who knows, that is a different kind of buzz than I’m used to.
• Chipotle’s, my love for it has slowly grown over the past couple of years. I think I’m ready for the next step, but she told me it has to be colorless grade-A princess cut. She’s worth every penny.
• I’m always tickled by the deer my grandfather gave me. Whether in a Santa hat adorned with Christmas tree lights, a big Russian hat or an American Flag bandanna with sunglasses; he’s awesome.
• I loved that we really haven’t had neighbors since we moved in. Every scream, video game taunt or horribly gay statement was unrecorded which really let us explore our imagination.
• In relation to that last one here are the top three quotes to come out of the apartment: 3rd place: Stop ruining my birthday, 2nd place: Boo Butta and in 1st place….. Quigibo.
  
  Well, I must get back to saving… I don’t save anything where I work. I’m gonna finish this Crunch bar though. I will do that. See you comics either tonight or tomorrow (or both, snap!)
  
  Peaces