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Just as good as a Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich.

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Sir, there's a bag of crack by your feet... gonna smoke that?

And… we’re back. Yesterday was one of the best days of my life and as much as I want to say why, I have a phone conversation to have before I go jinxing myself. I’ll have more to say on that tomorrow (or whenever I blog next, but if it goes my I’ll definitely get back on that tomorrow!)

On Monday I was haunted by what someone once told me “… no wonder women are all over you at work, you can see your d*ck in those pants!” I questioned if only I could see them while I was in the bathroom getting ready to leave work. I walked out of the bathroom and a couple of women called me over for random conversation. After two sentences I saw one looking directly into “the sun.” Then, and I’m not making it up, they both burst into laughter and walked away leaving me standing there feeling awkward and pretty unprofessional. I’m not wearing tight pants people, I’m just blessed. My gift, my curse…

Is Men in Black 3 really a good idea Sony? I can only hope a resounding “NO!” wakes me from my sleep soon. (And yes, it is in production)

It tickles me that at some point a man in a room full of executives said “I have a great idea, I think the next big movie this year will be… Tank Girl.” The fact that he walked out of the room without being beaten to death leaves me puzzled, but it tickles me to death.

As cool as most people seem to find Twitter, I refuse to believe that someone cares or want to read my every action. I’ll be that last guy who fought getting a cell phone until the Motorola RAZR came out… for free.

I’ve been giving random strangers (women) compliments and seeing how that goes. I’ll report back once the first slice of strange has been seized and mounted. thundercats… thunderCATS… THUNDERCATS… HO!!!

I’ve been waiting for my T-Mobile contract to run out in June so I can finally join the beautiful people who carry iPhones. Now, I might have to wait a little longer because Apple is certain to put out a 32GB iPhone. So help me father, why do you play these games?

My new favorite Adult Swim show is Delocated. If you have not seen it, I suggest you go check it out: http://www.adultswim.com/

Justin Timberlake (or JT to the gayer fans out there) says he will not make an album anytime soon… My heart is broken Justin, yet another Chris Tucker artist that captures my heart and urinates right into the valve. That is what I like about Lil Wayne, you can’t get enough of this man. Everyday it seems he has a new song you can find on YouTube or a mixtape somewhere. And I’m sure Tha Carter IV will be out by the summer’s end. Appreciate the fans that made you filthy rich, we’re why you can afford to bang Jessica Biel on a beige Tiger’s back Justin! I’ll miss you…

Because my roommate Kevin came home (cause he basically does not live with us) I was unable to watch LOST last night. I’ve become quite the fan and have to avoid all conversations and any media revolving around the show. All so that we could watch UFC WHATEVERTHEF*CKTHATREALITYSHOWISCALLED… blarg.

Nelson and I heard a song the other night that had about 50 consecutive seconds of censorship. LOL. Do they realize that whatever that rapper said has now done nothing but stoked the fires of my curiosity? I was blown away that someone could speak that long and not sneak a couple of words together that were deemed appropriate. That must be the dirtiest monologue known to man. It must have an effect worse than the brown noise. That’s right, a South Park reference. I’ll post the video once I ever see that song again.

Show the Fowlest some love ya’ll, he’s on the blog roll…

Eh, all this KFC I’ve ingested over the past 48 hours has not been kind to me… poop. Nelson hates that I love poop humor so much. Eat that Sean Paul Ellis, another POOP joke. Mmmm Mmmm Mmmm, just like momma used to make.

How uninteresting is life? On Saturday night I had a dream that two friends and I rode around looking for a bank that I could cash in my change at… yep.

I’m eating a Kit Kat bar. Get jealous, uh oh, someone wants one… I’ll chew with my mouth open to avoid sharing. There, she looked away.

I’ve decided to go ahead and do a website (a good one), and with all the great sites (I particularly like Weems’) I think mine would be best animated. We’ll see if it works as well onscreen as it does in my mind.

Okay, I’m gonna let this baby marinate and hopefully I’ll have great news tomorrow. If I don’t, maybe God will deliver me some Kielbasa straight from the Costco-Clause (like Santa, not as funny now that I’ve explained it… damn) to make me feel better. Here’s looking towards tomorrow.



Peaces

1 comment:

SPE said...

You should join twitter when you get the iPhone. There's no excuse. As I was reading your post I found out that someone from the porn industry is now following me on twitter.

Lost was "off the chain last night, son." I used that phrase correctly, right? I'm trying.

Poop.

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I blog during work to keep from sleeping. Unless people from my job are monitoring this, in which case "I love my job; I have a family". My dog Max is the man too. Other than that I think reading this blog gives a pretty good idea of what I'm about. Red Jell-o, need I say more.

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