By 3 O’ Clock (ET) we will have our press conference where we see a dead Bigfoot. Tell me I’m the only one who’s got the slightest bit of a chub going…
Last night I actually watched the Olypics for about an hour (oh God, maybe 2) and saw this incredible Michael Phelps. He’s every bit of the nasty that the media hypes him to be. With an iPod in his ear until it’s time to jump in the water, I like that. While he was cut up, Kevin and I couldn’t help but notice that his partner (I want to call him Costigan) was a bit of a chubster. Like an everyman who was in the crowd until someone yelled “Our other American is injured! Won’t one of you fans come down here and swim for your country?!” Lucky him, he just happened to be wearing a Speedo. With all the medals that Phelps has/is winning, the other has got to be shrooming while there. Who’s paying attention to him? I can’t really remember his name. But then again, who the f*ck am I? Not an Olympian that’s for sure.
Might sound crazy, but as a man who has music playing in his ears/head 99% of the time, silence is beautiful. Not the silence you all are thinking of, but when it’s so loud that for a moment I shut it all out and time itself has weight. Similar to making eye contact with the squirrel you want to move out of your wheels direction or remembering something you used to love as a child that hadn’t crossed your mind “in forever”. A whisper can send a shock wave up your spine depending on who’s breath is on your neck. Sorry, felt in a real mellow mood for a minute there. Back to whatever the F this is…
One day, will we speak of Jim Carrey like we speak of Steve Martin. Hopefully, Jim Carrey’s name won’t become synonymous with “I ain’t going to see that $#!T”, like Steve Martin.
I just saw one of the finest Filipino women I’ve ever seen. That is all.
I just thought back on one of the ruder things I’ve done over the last few years. There was a girl named who Adrian who I used to work with that looked exactly (and I mean it with every bone in my body) like RuPaul. If you don’t know who that is “Google that $#!T”, for everyone else… One day we were making jokes and I let her know that she looked like him. Not flattering for a woman, I guess, but I was so intent on proving my point I turned to the world wide web. Remember when people called it that? I pulled up a picture of RuPaul and clipped her picture from a website to compare it to. After about 10 people agreed, laughing hysterically, she seemed on the verge of tears and pretty upset. I wish I’d taken the time to laugh but back then I wasn’t completely cold to other people’s emotions. If only I had another chance, I’d make that $#!T into a t-shirt.
Smile, do really even need a reason?
Sorry for the shorty, but my day is as busy as Britney Spears va-jay jay… that was unnecessary, I don’t know Britney. Only what the tabloids have lead me to believe. She’s probably a good parent who married a back up dancer and cheated on Justin Timberlake. I can forgive the back up dancer, K-Fed up in this b*tch, but not your infidelity, not that. (anyone remember that Meatloaf song “I would do anything for love but I won’t do that”? That $#!T was bumpin!)
Laters
Last night I actually watched the Olypics for about an hour (oh God, maybe 2) and saw this incredible Michael Phelps. He’s every bit of the nasty that the media hypes him to be. With an iPod in his ear until it’s time to jump in the water, I like that. While he was cut up, Kevin and I couldn’t help but notice that his partner (I want to call him Costigan) was a bit of a chubster. Like an everyman who was in the crowd until someone yelled “Our other American is injured! Won’t one of you fans come down here and swim for your country?!” Lucky him, he just happened to be wearing a Speedo. With all the medals that Phelps has/is winning, the other has got to be shrooming while there. Who’s paying attention to him? I can’t really remember his name. But then again, who the f*ck am I? Not an Olympian that’s for sure.
Might sound crazy, but as a man who has music playing in his ears/head 99% of the time, silence is beautiful. Not the silence you all are thinking of, but when it’s so loud that for a moment I shut it all out and time itself has weight. Similar to making eye contact with the squirrel you want to move out of your wheels direction or remembering something you used to love as a child that hadn’t crossed your mind “in forever”. A whisper can send a shock wave up your spine depending on who’s breath is on your neck. Sorry, felt in a real mellow mood for a minute there. Back to whatever the F this is…
One day, will we speak of Jim Carrey like we speak of Steve Martin. Hopefully, Jim Carrey’s name won’t become synonymous with “I ain’t going to see that $#!T”, like Steve Martin.
I just saw one of the finest Filipino women I’ve ever seen. That is all.
I just thought back on one of the ruder things I’ve done over the last few years. There was a girl named who Adrian who I used to work with that looked exactly (and I mean it with every bone in my body) like RuPaul. If you don’t know who that is “Google that $#!T”, for everyone else… One day we were making jokes and I let her know that she looked like him. Not flattering for a woman, I guess, but I was so intent on proving my point I turned to the world wide web. Remember when people called it that? I pulled up a picture of RuPaul and clipped her picture from a website to compare it to. After about 10 people agreed, laughing hysterically, she seemed on the verge of tears and pretty upset. I wish I’d taken the time to laugh but back then I wasn’t completely cold to other people’s emotions. If only I had another chance, I’d make that $#!T into a t-shirt.
Smile, do really even need a reason?
Sorry for the shorty, but my day is as busy as Britney Spears va-jay jay… that was unnecessary, I don’t know Britney. Only what the tabloids have lead me to believe. She’s probably a good parent who married a back up dancer and cheated on Justin Timberlake. I can forgive the back up dancer, K-Fed up in this b*tch, but not your infidelity, not that. (anyone remember that Meatloaf song “I would do anything for love but I won’t do that”? That $#!T was bumpin!)
Laters
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